The Halloween Trama of a Dark Jedi (Part II: Candy and Ninjas)

Oh and what a Halloween it was! By far one of the best in many years. I loved my costume and it didn’t matter if people called me a dork or “sci-fi nerd” because it was amazing and nobody could discount the sheer awesomeness of it, especially with the lightsaber alongside it. There is something about a Jedi all in black with a blue lightsaber that is so…right. People who thought they knew what they were talking about commented that I should have a red lightsaber, I just laughed and told them they obviously had not seen episode III which this costume is strait out of. So basically I hung out with Shawn or I should say Shauna, for he was dressed in full out drag, and it was quite…disturbing, but no less amazing. My costume however (if I do say so myself) toped anyone’s and everyone’s. So what UP does for Halloween is open up the dorms to the local children so they can go from door to door in a safe environment and collect candy.

So Shawn and I went to Mehling the large 8 story all girls dorm to beg for candy and to—of course—scare little children. I succeed in doing so, I put my hood up and ignited my lightsaber and waited around corners for little kids to coming running through the hall. A few jumped backed, a few screamed, and a few tried to fight me. One kid that was dressed up as Vader had a little plastic red lighsaber. He came up to me in the lobby of Mehling and attempted to strike me down. But I blocked and we dueled it out for a while in the lobby as about 50 kids passed by with their parents. I think some of the parents were more impressed with the costume then the kids, but it was defiantly a huge hit everywhere I went.

We then rendezvoused with Christine and Jessica and went over to Shipstad hall who was putting on the annual haunted house in their basement. Now I have changed a lot since the little puny 5^th grader that I was, and I hardly ever get scared (I laughed at times and was bored out of my mind for Saw III). This was no different, in retrospect it was probably the one of the best haunted house’s I’ve been to, and the originality was pretty good, ranging from a mysterious black creature charging you in the hallway to Samara from The Ring coming out from behind the TV and then start crawling over to you. Entertaining to say the least, and everyone else seemed to be scared, so it was fun.

But by far the most entertaining part of the night happened on our way across campus to get to the Haunted house in Shipstad. Along the way we met three Ninja, and I mean full out Ninjas. The lead one (whitey) sees me walking through the quad with my cloak flowing and my lightsaber glowing and he pulls out a three-prong dagger and points it at me. The other two turn and start walking towards me. I turn to them and exclaim, “You want to go? Lets go!” so they reach behind and Redy and Blacky pull out their num-chucks while Whity just steps back to let them attack. I raise my saber and twirl a few times seeing if I can intimidate them. I succeed and they slow their pace but still start to try to circle me. Shawn Jessica and Christine all step away and watch smiling knowing that three ninjas are no match for a Jedi corrupted by the Dark Side of the Force. Redy and Blacky come at me from two sides, I duck into a crouch then spring up to my right on top of Blacky and hit his num-chucks away from him, exposing his body, I swiftly spin clockwise pulling my saber back and bringing it back around to make contact with his crotch. He falls over on the ground, and Redy is charging me from the left, I step to my right facing him and turn my back to him spinning my saber backwards into his chest. This throws him off guard and he steps back a step to catch his balance, I then take the opportunity and strike a firm blow to his masked head. He stagers backwards toward Whitey as Blacky gets up from the ground retrieves his num-chucks and trots back over to the other two. Whitey has his dagger raised but quickly lowers it conceding. I nod my head and they walk off into the parking lot and we continued our journey to Shipstad.

So Halloween was something to look forward to and it is still something to look back on and say, “man those were the good times, back when you could beat up Ninjas and nobody cared.”

The Halloween Trama of a Dark Jedi (Part I: Near Death and Destruction)

About six months ago during my exploits on eBay I discovered an item that would make Halloween my new favorite holiday of the year. Okay perhaps that is a slight over-statement... or perhaps it is an under-statement. But still, it would be really cool. For my birthday Shawn had bought me (god bless his heart) an FX lightsaber, the blue Anakin one from Episode III (and actually the same one that Luke gets from Obi-wan in the original). So I found the ultimate costume on eBay, the complete recreation of Anakin Skywalker's Jedi costume. So I followed a few different versions of it for a few months. About the month before Halloween I started bidding on a few different ones. The guy who makes him has his own small company who makes a variety of replica costumes ranging from Star Wars to Kill Bill. So after losing two separate auctions and running out of time with shipping time factored in, I contacted the maker outside of eBay and arranged to purchase one plus a black cloak and belt, a total of about $50 more (which normally are not included) for just ten dollars more then the "buy it now" price. Amazingly he accepted and the costume was on its way. I received the costume a week and a half later, plenty early for Halloween.

The next week our family went through what was perhaps the most frightening moment in our lives, which was followed by probably the worst week of school this year. My dad was painting the gable of our house--the part above our front porch. My sister was on the computer, my mom was rinsing a paintbrush, and I was upstairs in my room working on homework on an ordinary Sunday afternoon. This is when I heard a loud crash coming from outside, as if my dad had dropped the ladder while moving it. I went over to the window and looked out thinking he was on the South side still, he was not. Not a half second later my sister starts screaming from downstairs, "Dad Fell off the Ladder!!!" My mom, "what?" We all ran outside and my dad was lying on his back about 8 feet away from the porch after taking about 15 foot drop from the roof. Somehow the Ladder had slipped out from under him causing it to fall on the railing of the porch, thus catapulting him backwards while doing a back flip (or two, he wasn't sure) and landing on top of a small prickly bush in the flowerbed. His feet were about 6 inches from a steel railing that climbed the steep slope of our front yard, his torso was about a foot away from the cement walkway, and his head was about an inch and a half away from a large volcanic rock that my mom is so fond of collecting. Had he fallen anywhere but there he would most likely be dead or seriously injured. three passers-by that saw the catipultaion ran over to see if my dad was okay, he was conscious and fully aware, but could not move; he instructed us to get a wet cloth. We called an ambulance, and the firemen loaded him onto a stretcher and carried him down the 24 steps to the street. I rode along with him in the Ambulance to the hospital and my mom and sister followed. We ended up being there for about 4 to 5 hours, until he could get checked out, which eventually he never did, and just got up and left because he had been waiting for 45 minutes just for the paperwork. Now he is mostly recovered and very lucky to be alive.

That week of school sucked ass. I had three tests on Wednesday; Microbiology, Anatomy Lab, and Statistics. I was finally able to arrange to take the Anatomy Lab test (all the muscles in the body) on Thursday, but by that time it was too late. I got a B on the Stats test and failed the other two...damn it. So I just kept going day by day. My cousin was pulled out of his private school which was difficult for him with his Autism and placed in the local public school alongside his twin brother who is also autistic. My grandfather continued down the destructive path of dementia, and nothing seemed to go right for a while. Halloween was starting to look better and better, at least I had something to look forward to.

"these procedures would be so much easier if you did them on healthy people" -House

The Sith and The Jedi: Codes and introductions

Sith:

Peace is a lie, there is only passion.

Through passion, I gain strength.

Through strength, I gain power.

Through power, I gain victory.

Through victory, my chains are broken.

The Force shall free me.

The Jedi equate the light with goodness and strength and the dark with weakness and evil. That is their tradition and it is truly no surprise that they cling to it for comfort. We however do not treat the force as a burden. We treat it as a gift, a thing to be celebrated. We use it to acquire power over others… and why should we not? Because the Jedi say we should not? We are as the Force is meant to be. The Jedi would hide that from you… they would tell you the dark side is too quick, too easy, all so that they need never challenge the passions that lie within them. Joining with us means realizing your true potential. It means not stifling yourself solely for the sake of hide-bounding shamans and their antiquated notion of order. You all have the potential to become true Sith. Only one of you, however, will succeed. You must learn for yourself. Remember you are competitors here…fight for your destiny, or go home…if you survive. Be what you were meant to be. Are you ready to learn the secrets of the dark side? Dare you?

Jedi:

There is no emotion, there is peace.

There is no ignorance, there is knowledge.

There is no passion, there is serenity.

There is no chaos, there is harmony.

There is no death, there is the Force.

The way of the light is long and difficult, as you must learn. Are you ready for such hardship? You have a destiny upon you that you must be prepared to face. The path you have chosen to walk is difficult. Intensive training will prepare you physically for the demands of the Order. Meditation will teach you to channel the power of the force. To truly understand the way of the Jedi, you must open your mind to knowledge. Seek wisdom in the teachings of the great masters of our order. A Jedi is never alone—others in the order will always stand by you. Do not be afraid to turn to them when you need help in your training. The way of the Jedi is difficult, it requires great discipline. Yet even though you are a mere apprentice your potential is unlimited. But do not let your head be filled with visions of glory and power! Such thoughts are the path to the dark side. I am honored to welcome you fully into the Jedi Order.

Knights Of The Old Republic III: The New Order

So there has been whispers of another sequal to the award winning Knights of the Old Republic, however none of them have been confirmed or even thought to be true, So I have taken up the role and devised a plot for number three. Only people who have played the games will really know whats going on for parts of it, but it is also open enough for new players to become familure with the setting.

Here's my idea for Knights of the Old Republic III, take it or leave it. This takes place a few decades after the events of #2 which gives you pleanty of time to wrap up all those lose ends and also something to discover as you play ("So what happened after #2?"). But anyways, you are a--once again--a soldier, scout, or scoundral. You start on some backwater planet (Corillia?) and you end up winning the Ebon Hawk (somehow it was recovered from either the depths of Malacor V or from your custom character in #2) in a game of pazzak or something.

So then you take off when you are intercepted by a Republic ship wondering how you got the Ebon Hawk, They discover the remains of HK-47 and T3 hidden under some floorplates, and a message in t3 from Bou-Dur.

They say you must take the Ebon Hawk to Dantooine for Jedi inspection because they have been looking for it for some time. There you are trained, and such. You then train with your Jedi Master, Perhaps a Yoda/Master Vandar species?

So you then go on your way with you little green friend and your two new droids, and do a mission or two on Kashyyyk (freeing the wookies/regaining Czerka control--depending on how you play[insert Jedi capable Wookie/Ithorian) or on perhaps Alderaan (cause we havent been there yet [Enter Jedi Capable soldier class here--opposite sex]) or on Kessel (you get captured and must escape with/without slaves [enter smuggler member here]) Then after two missions of your choosing you get intersepted by a Sith Warship , you fight your way through and meet up with some Dark Jedi who trys to convince you to join the Sith, he also ends up joining your group to the protest of you Jedi master--but a truce is made between the two saying that you are the reason they come along and that you must choose your own path.

Then you head off to Tatooine, Yaven IV, and Kamino. On Tatooine the Sandpeople have taken over the city, and you must wipe them out, you get the chance to talk to their leader later. On Yaven IV you enter the great temples and surrouding areas and experience great temptation with the dark side of the force. And on Kamino you discover that the Jedi are not always truthful and have begun a small scale Jedi clone facility[Enter Kaminoan tech here]. You must destroy it (even your Jedi Master agrees) and you have the dark/light options at the end when you meet a lead member of the council . All this time you are being lectured by both Jedi and Sith. By the end of your misson the Jedi and Sith fleets colide and you are stuck in the middle, trying to negotiate/initiate war. Onboard the Ebon Halk a fight breaks out between Jedi and Sith, and you have to choose one side or the other, it is half your party against the other and you must choose.

After you choose Light or Dark, you then lead the attack on the other fleet by landing on the opposing fleet's command ship and killing everyone you can as well as trying to convert jedi/sith to your cause. You build an army, plant some charges, and finally storm the Bridge where you face either the Sith Lord, his apprentice (Darth Bane*) and Dark Jedi or the Jedi Council. Then you duke it out with ALL OF YOUR PARTY**. Then you win and the Galaxy is saved from another war or is engulfed in another Sith Conquest.

THE END

So total you get to play as: your custom character, Yoda/Vandar-like Jedi, A full Dark Jedi, Alderaan Soldier with the possibility of becoming a Jedi/Sith, A Wookie or an Ithorian both with the possibility of becoming a Jedi/Sith, a Scoundral that is just a little less annoying then Atton, T3-M4 the utility droid, and HK-47 the assasin droid. Thats a total of 9 playable characters in a single game, four of which (including yourself) are/can become Jedi or Sith. That sounds like a fun game to me.

*note: If you follow the Light path, you fight with Darth Bane, but he lives despite if you follow the dark side at the end and try to kill him. He escapes and is not heard of again.

**note: "all of your party" is in reference to all your key playable characters that stood by your side inside the Ebon Hawk, NOT the legion of Jedi/Sith you have collected along your way to the bridge.

Why am I late? Well I was just driving down MLK when... [An original monologe by Alexander Cole]

"Oh! I'm so sorry Proffesor. Yes I know I'm late. What? Why am I late? Oh. Well you see I live in southeast portland, a good 20 minutes away, and I have to commute each day. What? Yes I know this doesn't explain why I am late. So what happened was, I was driving down MLK and I left ten minutes earlier then I usually do because I wanted to meet with you about the assignment that's due next monday. Well you see, I was just driving down MLK when I saw smoke bellowing up from a building a block off the street. So naturally, hopeing that nobody was hurt I pulled over to see if I could help. Well the building on fire ended up being the Portland Orphanage that I had just volluntered at only a few weeks ago.

Well the fire department had not shown up yet, and so I assisted the nuns that run the Orphanage to carry the smaller orphans out of the burning building. Well after a few minutes the Firetrucks did show up, and we had already got most of the orphans out. The ambulance came and picked up the injured ones, but they could not fit all the injured into the back of the ambulance, and the other ambulance was stuck in trafic on I5. So I volentiered to take two of the orphans in my car and follow the ambulance up to OHSU for treatment. So I got the car, shuffled the two children in and took off following the ambulance accross the river and up the hill. Yeah, I know.

Robbie is the boy, he had some bad burns on his legs but was being real tough about it--he's only about 12 or so. The girl Vanessa, she's about 8 and very quiet. She had broken her leg when the stairwell collapsed as she was trying to escape. The only thing she said was "I hope Emily is alright." Robbie told me Emily is Vanessa's best friend and that she was one of the girls who was put in the ambulance infront of us. Well we made it to OHSU pretty quickly and I helped unload the orphans. I carried Vanessa in, and we got them all admited. Unfortunatly because of their orphan statis, they had nobody to sign off on the liability forms. I ended up signing for them because the proper care would not be administered unless someone signed the form. There was really nothing else I could do, so I told the nurse that I had to get to class and that I would come back after it was over. So I drove here as fast as the speed limit would allow and here I am. So the reason why I am late is: I was helping orphans escape from a burning building. Yes sir. Thank you proffesor, it won't happen again."

III, DL 240's, and Cadavers

So here I am in the Pilot house at the University of Portland, sitting here with three hours of nothingness. So apparently my Anatomy class was canceled today without my knowledge. Supposedly my prof send out two emails that she was sick, but because she labeled the email Ill which when it is ariel font looks like the roman numeral III I did not recognise it and skiped over it in my inbox because I was rushed to study for my Microbiology and Statistics tests. Oh well.

The verdict on the Volvo is good, the problem was a relay for the fuel pump thus the fuel pump was not getting the voltage required to run and therefor start the engine. So it was replaced and now the little darling is runing like a cat on rollarskates. This happend like a few weeks ago but I forgot to inform my oh so loyal reader base *cough, cough.* Sorry I am a little sick and have been coughing sneezing and yuck for a few days. And of course my Acting proffesor will not be happy with me because the first two rules of acting is "never get sick." and "never get sick." Oh yeah, and the definition is "To do truthfully under imaginary circumstances."

Yesterday was the first day that we got to work with cadavers in my anatomy lab. one male, one female. The female is going on two years here at UP, (the preservitives keep them preserved forever--I'm not joking, seriously forever!) and the male we just got in this summer and so he is not fully disected yet. The female is down to strictly bone, muscle and organs. but the man--well, he's more intact. It was really cool and a great opportunity to do this, and I am looking forward to working with them, however not so much about the mermoization of all the muscles--which is probably what I should be doing now. Okay well for now, Seacrest out.

So here I am, not as happy as I should be...

So what prompted that title? A nice little chat with Shawn online. But that is for later. So the thrid week of school is comming to a close, and it has been shitty. It doesnt help that my sister is playing sad music downstairs and its raining outside. I want to listen to good happy music to try to cheer me up, but the stupid new iTunes has completely fucked with my songs but that is for later too. So what is for now? I don't know. This is post is supposed to be like an internal monologe, like the ones weve been talking about in my acting class. So lets start there...the only bright part of my life right now--my acting class. Some of our assignments have been: What would you do with a million dollars?, stalk a person, stalk and try to mimic three other people's walks, and Find a happy place.

So what are my other classes? Anatomy, Microbiology, Statistics, Anatomy Lab, Micro Lab (and of course the acting). Anatomy is fun but very difficult and i just got the first quiz back with a nice fat F on the front. Anatomy Lab is probably my hardest class...and only one credit--so that blows--but it is sooo cool, and i really like it, i just hope i did better on the exam we took on wendsday then on the anatomy quiz. Micro can be dull sometimes, but amazing at other times--the Lab is fun but hard to follow what we are supposed to be doing. And I hate math, so you can guess how i feel about Statistics. But being that I am loaded down with all these sciences, that means i can't be involved in the plays this semester hardly at all. I am working fridays and saturdays, leaving my weekends to work and studing with minimal friend time. So thats school.

Not to much to say about anything else--cause i have no life. damn it. So here i am musicless and only listening to my sister's downstairs that like i said is kind of depressing. and its raining...but i already said that. Yeah so Shawn told me that i just had to download the new iTunes, saying that it is soo much better. My vote: blahhh. I have a few beefs with it, but the main one is; I CANT PLAY MY FUC*ING MUSIC! I try to play a song and it skips and is all staticy. at first i thought it was only the new stuff that shawn put on it, but no, its all the music. plus it takes forever to activate, because of the dumb album cover pictures that it downloads--I dont care about the pictures--I have the songs to listen to the songs, not to look at the pretty pictures of cd cases (and it looks like they just stole the rotating affect strait out of a video game) but whatever, i could care less--other then the fact that I CANT PLAY MY FUC*ING MUSIC because its so painful to listen too.

So i tell shawn all of this, and try to explain what is wrong with the iTunes, and he accuses me of a hateing all change, i say and i quote, "I don't hate change. I hade bad change." and this iTunes is bad change. So i guess hes had a bad day and so i was the lucky one that got to listen to all the reasons why he hates Alex; or more specificly, me. Well some of the stuff just pissed me off...A lot, because it is completely false,, and if he actually believes all that crap then i guess we didnt know eachother like i thought we did. But it looks like its time for me to go find something to eat again. So here i am, not as happy as i should be.

This may be the end of the Volvo Chronicles…

So I went to the beach last week with my family to celebrate my sister’s birthday. We packed the car and all that fun stuff and pulled out. Well we were planning on moving the Volvo up off the street and into the driveway while we were gone. But no, once again it wouldn’t start. Dead again. This makes it (I think) the sixth or seventh time it has died on me in the last three months. So sufficient to say we left it while we were gone.

We came back half expecting it to start back up with no problem like it always does. It did not. So my dad and I got out the wrenches, pliers, and a flashlight and went to work. Everything seemed to be in good order that we could see. So the diagnosis it is fuel related. To check we attempted to pry open the fuel pump—which in theory should come apart no problem. It did not. It didn’t even budge. Damn. So we took of the filter and sprayed some starter fluid into it and it kind of started, but never kept going obviously. So we know it is fuel related. Now whether that mean it is a problem with the fuel system or the electrical incorporated in relation to the fuel we don’t know. So we towed it over to the mechanic my dad knows with the truck—me in the Volvo working the brakes for both vehicles. It worked okay until we were like a block from the mechanics house, when my dad applied his brakes—which he isn’t supposed to do (I’m doing the brakes so that the tow rope doesn’t snap and pull the bottom of the Volvo off and the trailer hitch of the truck off). Well I guess I should have braked more—but I didn’t know so the tow rope snapped, causing the pit that holds the bolt into the trailer hitch to fly off. Of course the Volvo flies forward and nearly hits the truck before I can cram the brake on. And my dad yanks the Volvo forward, trying to even it out. We lost the pin (which was later recovered) and nothing was damaged so it ended up not being as traumatic as it seemed at the time.

So the Volvo is in the shop, and I started school on Monday (the 28th) and my dad started his new job the same day…so for now I’m driving the truck and my dad is driving the his VFR (Yellow Honda motorcycle). I’m looking in the classifieds for a new car like every other day now. My dad and I are hoping that we can find a 65 or 66 Mustang for relatively cheep that is in decent condition, because 1) We are going to be putting money into this new car anyways, so why throw it away on a car that when we sell, it has no value—where as if we put money into the mustang then at least it will increase the value of it and we will get our money back when we sell it. And 2) We have a 66 Mustang that is in pieces that we bought from a friend and we want to have an example car to compare our 66 to, so why not just buy the same car and then it would be like buying two cars for the price of one. And 3) if anything breaks or needs replacing, we have the parts already for our 66.

I want a Mustang…

GAHHHHH ! ! ! ! ! Will the Volvo Chronicles Never End? (Part: MCLXXVII)

I can't believe this! So yesterday the Volvo was fine, behaving perfectly. I did notice though driving home some strange smell--I figured it was the truck I was following, it wasn't. It didn’t smell like the smell of burning rubber, smoking break disks, overheated engine, low oil, or any other smell that I am used to by now. It did smell like dead mouse (or mole) however, which is also a bad sign, but at least that wouldn't be car related. Well I never actually discovered what the smell was.

So today I went to PCC and took my Midterm Exam for the Nutrition class that I am taking over the summer. It went...okay. Some questions were really stupid (the ones that are meant to just trick and confuse you) and others weren’t even covered in lecture, notes, or the book, so I'm not sure how she got away with giving us those questions. Anywhoo, I finish feeling kind of depressed--you know like "oh shit, i just condemned myself to a lifetime of servitude to McDonalds Drive-thru!" But that depressed feeling has been occurring quite frequently within the last few weeks. Whether I’m just bored with summer or if I’m actually kind of depressed due to my pathetic existence does not change the fact that this post is supposed to be about my car and not about my current mental state. Sooo... I get back to the car and remember the odd smell the previous day so I decide to check my oil. Good thing too, cause it was almost all the way down. So I filled it up with a quart of oil, and then started the baby up and drove off.

Well being that I hadn't filled up the car (with gas) recently I decided to stop at the Arco just off of the Ross Island Bridge. I stopped it, turned off the car, and went inside to pay [stupid Arcos]. I come back and try to start it...unsuccessfully. It turns over just fine but the engine does not ignite. I had an employee help me push it over to the side-parking lot. The oil light was on, but I knew that it wasn't the oil that was causing the problem (cause I had just filled it up like 15 minutes ago, remember?). The Cooling fluid was normal, the oil was fine, it was a little hot, but that is expected when it is 100 fucking degrees outside. So mi madre came and picked me up after she and I pushed the car onto a side street (like TWO BLOCKS DOWN--cause of the stupid "1 hour" parking rule").

My dad got home late and we had dinner with my aunt who just got back from Kashmir India, where she was attending a friends wedding (the bomb that went off in Kashmir that you probably didn’t see on the news [cause America sucks...] was literally 4 blocks from where she was staying.) So tonight at like 9:00 my dad and I took the truck and tow-cable and towed it to our extra lot from our old house. The spark plugs are fine, and everything looks in great condition--our best bet is that the fuel pump could be broken (thus wasting the $31 of gas that I just put in today). So that's my story, take it as it is: crappy.